MERIDYTH: The new proposed Crime and Policing Bill is just repackaging existing laws and calling it progress. It simply looks to reduce the red tape in order to catch the perpetrators faster. But it doesn’t actually prevent crimes from happening.

Alister: It's not just about catching criminals faster. It's about deterring crime in the first place. The bill introduces significant new measures, like expanded powers to search homes for stolen phones, including stop and search. And there’s increased sentences for assaulting emergency workers.

MERIDYTH: But those powers come with risks. Remember the controversy over stop and search in London? It disproportionately affected minorities and didn't significantly reduce knife crime. We need to address the root causes of crime.

Alister: Fair point, but the bill also includes measures for better police training and accountability. And let's not forget the new provisions for tackling serious organised crime and child sexual abuse. These are real improvements that could make a real difference.

MERIDYTH: I'm not saying there aren't any good points in the bill, but it's not enough. With retail crime at its highest levels, as well as record levels of knife crime in certain regions, there needs to be more boots on the ground and more funding.

🇬🇧 No squabble required

💸 Modelling is ‘Derelicte’. Finally, former Brookside star and his accomplices have been jailed for defrauding victims hoping to get into modelling. The scam also involved payday loans and smuggling cash out of the UK — with more than 6,000 victims losing over £13.6m.

🚗 That’s not the gear shift! Driving instructors in the UK are not covered by “position of trust“ laws, which look after young people. Sexual harassment claims against driving instructors are increasing, often from under 18s. Calls for the laws to be amended have also gotten louder.

🪙 New crypto scam. A fake police officer has been contacting individuals, telling them they’re victims of fraud. As a precautionary follow-up, the ‘policeman’ told victims a ‘security officer’ would call to access and check their crypto wallets. Nine people lost a combined £1m!

 🚓 Hoping for transparency. After the Southport knife attack, social media spread false news leading to racial tensions and riots. While current laws prohibit sharing details of an ongoing investigation, the police now want to change that — by being able to release some details when false news looks to tip towards violence. This request is now being reviewed.

😱 What are ‘Neets’? Sounds like nits, which would be better. Neet = Not in Education, Employment, or Training. And there are a staggering 987,000 young people (16-24yo) who are classified as Neets — that’s 1 in 8!

🌎️ The rest of the world… according to us

🔮 Gaza limbo. The first stage of the ceasefire has come to an end. So what’s next? Hopes for peace quickly diminished when Israel cut off humanitarian aid to Gaza, in order to pressure Hamas to a new proposal to extend the ceasefire. While Israel claims to have the backing of Trump, the U.S. has yet to comment.

🇪🇺 Who you gonna call? After the awkward meeting between America and the Ukraine, Europe quickly rallied together. It has become increasing clear the US is not the ally it once was. In response, the UK is putting £1.6m where their mouth is in show of support to the Ukraine.

🇺🇸 What happened to Hackman? Police are investigating the deaths of Gene Hackman, his wife, and their dog. While foul play isn’t being considered, the circumstances have been deemed suspicious. Pacemaker data shows he may have died 10 days earlier. And the gas leak theory seems to have been dispelled.

🇰🇵 No signal. No internet. No cash machines. North Korea has unexpectedly allowed tours for western tourists to resume in a secluded region of the country — with tight restrictions. Seemingly a test to see the impact, it’s definitely an unusual holiday choice!

🍎 Part of your ‘5 A Day’

👵 It’s getting hot in here. Extreme heat may cause you to age faster, especially if you’re older. Researchers have found that our bodies break down faster when exposed to hotter climates. This may be the first time I’m thankful for the cold weather in the UK!

⏰ Need help waking up? Kick the caffeine addiction and try smelling your way out of bed. Some scents apparently can make you more alert. So try a little peppermint, lemongrass, or orange aromatherapy to get you going in the mornings.

🏥 WASH. YOUR. HANDS. We might as well be copying and pasting this bit since the start of the year. Alarm bells are sounding again over fears of a second wave of the norovirus. Even those who have recently had the illness may be at risk again.

🧦 The odd sock

🤑 £64 trillion for free! A fat finger mistake by a Citigroup bank employee in America resulted in over $80 trillion being transferred. Even more shocking, two other employees checked and both approved it! It was only after someone checked the company’s balance sheet that it was spotted. Bad day in the office. 😬 

⛏️ Space miners. A space probe has been launched to mine an asteroid for rare minerals, like platinum, and confirm if it’s metallic. Metallic asteroids are more rare than those made of stone. If confirmed, a second mining probe (first of its kind) will follow. With some of these minerals costing £25,000 per kilo, this could potentially be a cheaper alternative!

🤬 Rants or Raves 🤩

by Alister

IKEA, love it or hate it. It serves its purpose. Throughout the years, I’ve assembled many flat-pack items without issue… until last weekend. After seven gruelling hours, I have some very choice words about the BESTÅ cabinet, which is only fit to give to your worst enemy.

My sanity was plunged into the very depths of hell, having to resort to breaking the supposedly simple, slide-in back panel in order to fit. It would’ve been far easier to slide it up the backside of the design team.

I repeat… SEVEN… hours. It required feats of patience, strength, and cursing I never knew I had. And yes, my relationship with my gf is still intact.

“C’mon, IKEA is made to be easy,” you might say. But after checking the reviews (after assembling), which are a storm of frustration and disappointment, I’ve learned a valuable lesson — Always read the reviews. ALWAYS.

🤣 What do you meme? 

My emergency contact…

Have you ever watched a close friend, significant other, or family member doing something silly, odd, or even reckless? Then have you thought to yourself, wait, that’s my emergency contact?

@sullivang_

blessed @Chadx_

This latest TokTok trend has people asking. “Can you believe this person is in charge during an emergency?”

Set to Hannah Montana song Ordinary Girl. It’s mostly men being a bit silly and playful, it’s definitely put a smile on my face.

Whew, you made it!

If you don’t hear from us next week, it just might be due to rat poison in Alister’s lunch. Check back next week to find out if he’s still alive.

Alister & Meridyth