Fisty cuffs at Starbucks?

ALISTER: China's cracking down on influencers spouting nonsense about medicine, finance, and law, stating they need actual qualifications. Finally! We're drowning in online scams and fake news, and they're finally stopping it at the source. The UK should copy this instead of faffing about with the Online Safety Act.

MERIDYTH: This is an attack on Free Speech. You're essentially giving authoritarian govts the ability to silence dissent. Requiring credentials sounds sensible… up until the moment they use it to ban political speech.

ALISTER: How else do you combat misinformation? People rarely change their minds. So debating things like health scams is pointless. We need to simply remove fake news. China's protecting actual lives from dodgy medical advice. You're defending the right of con artists to fleece vulnerable people.

MERIDYTH: But who decides which information is credible? The govt? We’re seeing first-hand in the U.S. with the Health Secretary making claims that acetaminophen (aka paracetamol) causes autism, based on “dodgy medical advice.”

ALISTER: “Free Speech” isn’t the same in this country. It’s not absolute. It’s a “qualified right” of expression, which means the govt can restrict it for reasons like public safety, prevention of crime, protection of health or morals and the reputation or rights of others.

MERIDYTH: There’s already an ongoing debate about the UK’s version of freedom of speech. So I guess our squabble is an extension of that. We need govt rules and policies for an orderly and functioning society, but given the state of global politics, it’s hard to trust any govt to decide what should and shouldn’t get airtime.

A man reportedly travelled 1,900 miles for a haircut, claiming it was still cheaper than his usual London barber. We're just impressed by the commitment to saving a few quid. You can show your (slightly less extreme) dedication by sharing The AM Squabble!

📦 Royal Mail in your hood. Thousands of UK corner shops are set for a makeover as 8,000 stores rebrand under Royal Mail, part of a £43.9m deal with Collect+. Shoppers will soon post parcels, pay bills, and use self-service kiosks in-store. The postal giant is also hiring 20,000 seasonal workers ahead of Christmas.

🤖 Cutting edge care. The UK’s largest robotic surgery training centre has opened in Berkshire, aiming to train thousands of surgeons. Backed by the NHS, the facility could help millions access minimally invasive procedures and bring faster recovery, smaller scars, and a glimpse of the future of healthcare made real.

🍺 Political pub fight. A London pub, Walker’s of Whitehall, and a local haunt for MPs and Downing Street staff, faces sanctions after neighbours complained of rowdy drinkers blocking their streets. Residents say they have felt intimidated and threatened!

🛡️ Cracking down on scams. UK mobile carriers are finally blocking spoofed phone numbers in a major anti-fraud move. This tech stops scammers from faking calls to look like they're from your bank or HMRC. It’s a long-overdue step to protect consumers from costly impersonation scams.

🗓️ 4-day work weeks. South Cambridgeshire defended its 4-day work week after ministers raised concerns about service delays, saying the move has cut staff turnover, saved £400,000, and kept services strong - even arguing performance “would’ve been far worse” without it.

GOOD NEWS… for hackers after it turned out that the Louvre’s CCTV password was “LOUVRE.” BAD NEWS… for the Oakland Museum of California, after over 1,000 items were stolen following a recent trend in museum thefts worldwide.

🇪🇺 Italy wants an EU army. As the diplomatic rift with Moscow deepens, Italy is pushing hard for an EU army. Rome argues a common defence force is essential for the bloc to become a credible global power and properly respond to growing security threats.

✈️ U.S. flights grounded. Over 2,500 flights were cancelled over the weekend after the FAA ordered airlines to slash routes amidst the govt shutdown. The Transportation Secretary warned air travel could soon shrink to a “trickle”, stranding families before Thanksgiving as unpaid air traffic controllers quit in droves.

🧱 Diplomacy by Lego. In a brilliant diplomatic move, Denmark’s Foreign Minister gifted a custom Lego pyramid to Egypt in celebration of the new Grand Egyptian Museum opening. The gift highlights the strong cultural ties between the two nations… and a great way to build bridges. 🤪

🎨 Starving artists no longer. Starting September 2026, Ireland will give €325 a week to about 2,200 artists and musicians under its new Basic Income for the Arts scheme. The programme, the world’s first, aims to ease financial stress and let creatives spend more time making art.

😟 London’s child obesity crisis. Nearly one in four London Year 6 pupils are now obese, the steepest rise in England. Health officials blame junk food access and inequality, warning the crisis is robbing children of healthy futures and piling pressure on the NHS.

📱 Gen Z breaks the ‘Happiness Curve’. A global Harvard study found young adults are unhappier than ever, with levels remaining flat until age 50. Citing anxiety, loneliness, money worries, and lack of purpose as key drivers, looks like we need to focus on some serious mental health support!

❤️ Exercise doesn’t waste heartbeats. Fit people’s hearts beat 10% fewer times per day than sedentary ones, even after workouts. With lower resting heart rates, athletes’ hearts work smarter, not harder, proving that regular exercise can literally add years to your life.

➡️ X's right-wing boost. A new study claims Twitter (X) is significantly amplifying right-wing accounts far more than left-wing ones. The research suggests algorithmic changes are favouring these voices, skewing the political discourse users see.

💥 ‘Big Short’ warning hits crypto. Analysts say Michael Burry’s bubble fears may be coming true with Bitcoin poised for a 50% crash. The famed investor behind The Big Short who predicted the housing crash (aka ‘08 Financial Crisis), warned that markets are “in a bubble,” as fear grips traders and crypto’s euphoria turns to panic.

🌌 We're not in the Matrix. Physicists are saying the universe can’t be a computer simulation. Using math theorems about logic and incompleteness, they found no algorithm could ever capture all truths of reality, proving the cosmos can’t be fully “coded,” not even by super-advanced beings.

By Alister

My favourite low-stakes drama this week, the "Chive Lord." On a chef subreddit, a user was on a daily quest to post photos of his perfectly-minced chives. But eagle-eyed users spotted his "Day 31" pile looked identical to "Day 23." (Meridyth: You have way too much time on your hands.)

A full-blown investigation followed, with people overlaying photos to prove the devastating truth. He was a fraud! He’d posted the exact same pile of chives from a slightly different angle. (Meridyth: I take it back. THESE people have way too much time on their hands.)

Busted, the "Chive Lord" confessed that car troubles had prevented his daily mincing, and he didn't want to leave fans with a "chiveless day." It’s so brilliantly absurd. As one user put it, "Chivelry is dead." If you want to see how a small lie about herbs spiralled, the full story is a guilty pleasure treat.

By Alister

This week's best video has to be the "We Wing Any Car" campaign (thanks to Squabble reader Lea for sharing!). It shows people fitting absurd wings to their regular cars, parodying the fact that private jets are completely exempt from fuel duty. Rather than get hammered at the petrol pump, add some wings!

It's a brilliant piece of satire that perfectly highlights the absurd inequality in our tax system. While we're all feeling the pinch, the ultra-wealthy get a pass. It’s a very funny, cutting reminder of who the rules are really written for. 💸

With festive markets opening and high street lights being switched on, it's official: you're now allowed to start thinking about Christmas. We won't judge you for that first mince pie... Join us next week for another Squabble!

Alister & Meridyth