“Even if you’re a girl”

ALISTER: There’s a video of a Tory MP playing vigilante at a Tube station trying to catch fare dodgers, but with no constructive solution. Where was he during the 14 years his party was running the country? Instead, he's having a go at London Mayor Sadiq Khan, who doesn’t even have any power over transport policy!

MERIDYTH: While he’s wrongly scapegoating Khan, I do think he raises a “fare” 😉 point. The fare evasion rate is 3.4%, which costs the TfL (and everyone, not just Londoners) over £130 million annually. I get so annoyed when rule-breakers push past barriers right in front of TfL staff, who simply let it happen. The MP’s video might be theatrical, but it’s bringing a real issue to the foreground.

ALISTER: But he didn’t even have permission for the video “crusade,” which got over 3 million views. It broke TfL's filming rules. The irony! And let's not forget, London's fare evasion rate is actually lower than cities like New York, currently at 9.8%. We should focus on making public transport more accessible rather than making it moral theatre.

MERIDYTH: You’re nit-picking with the filming rule. It’s social media, not a Hollywood movie. As for the NYC subway, with rising transit crime and outdated tech & infrastructure, fare evasion is the least of their worries. The TfL issue comes down to fairness and lack of consequences. They’ve said they'll deploy more enforcement officers and use data analysis, but where’s the proof? I certainly don’t see it.

ALISTER: But the video is spreading fake news and blaming it on the mayor. The Conservatives had years to sort out transport properly, but instead they're making ridiculous videos complaining about problems they helped create.

MERIDYTH: Would you like some cheese for that whine? Even if the messenger's a bit of a hypocrite, the message about basic fairness still resonates for those of us, who play by the rules, and it should be addressed.

🚰 “Off What”? Ofwat, the regulator for the water utility companies, has issued the biggest ever fine to Thames Water (£123m). This is after Thames Water claimed they can only exist as a private company if they stop getting fines. Looks like the Government might be taking them back sooner than expected.

🥅 Shopping VAR. Video Assistant Referee (VAR) is used in sports to replay and check for fair play. And now, it seems the idea has moved to our shopping. Tesco’s new self checkouts record you scanning items and then show a replay alerting you if anything wasn’t scanned properly. Maybe they’ll give staff a whistle and some cards too.

⌚️ Tick-Tock. Andrew and Tristan Tate will face 21 different serious offenses in the UK — human trafficking, sexual intercourse with a minor, money laundering, forming a criminal gang. Known for far right views and horrific misogyny, even Parliament sees them as a problematic influence for young boys.

⚽️ Speaking of horrific crime. Paul Doyle, a former Royal Marine and father of 3, appeared in court on Friday for the first time since he allegedly drove his car into the victory parade for Liverpool FC. His trial is set for November.

🚄 Uber to Paris? The idea of Eurostar competitors have been circling and now it feels like they are becoming reality. Uber announced a railway partnership to reopen two Kent stations as an alternative for travels from London Stratford to Paris (& beyond)!

🤖 Open the pod bay doors, Hal. AI’s explosive growth and the prospect of more affordable quantum computing has many countries worried. The UK’s military is throwing a massive £1bn into AI and creating a new generation of hackers. Cyber warfare isn’t just a topic of futuristic films. It’s a real budget item.

Good news… for stock market investors as Trump’s new nickname does the rounds, TACO, Trump Always Chickens Out, and he hates it. Bad news… for ancient artefacts, after a domestic tourist purposely damaged China’s terracotta warriors built in 209 BC!

🧑‍⚖️ DOGE this. Elon Musk’s DOGE will face a lawsuit by 14 US states accusing the team of illegally accessing government data, cancelling federal contracts, and firing thousands of govt employees. Don’t worry, Elon has hit out against Trump’s latest bill and left the White House. “Seagull management” — fly in, shit on everything, and leave.

🪠 A clean flush. It’s toilet humour time again. We really can’t help ourselves, can we? Spain is aiming to ban flushing of wet wipes. How will that possibly be enforced, you ask? They intend to charge wet wipe manufacturers for the clean-up costs in the sewers.

 🚭️ Take it farther outside. France is looking to ban smoking in all outdoor places that might be visited by children. Beaches, parks, bus stops etc. It’s a big step, but welcomed by many groups.

💊 Your doctor’s cut. Investigative journalists have found mental healthcare professionals in the UK have accepted £1m in payments from pharmaceutical companies since 2021. The government is considering what actions should be taken to avoid these conflicts of interest and ensuring patient care is always the main focus.

🍭 Think again about Splenda. Research has found that sucralose, an artificial sweetener (commonly known as Splenda), can make you hungrier. While it has zero calories, it may cause you to eat more. So check those diet soda labels!

💰️ The cheaper alternative. A heart-breaking story of one patient’s life after they were switched to a cheaper drug as part of NHS cost-cutting. The NHS is facing £1bn in cuts and ambitious savings. Sadly in this case, the patient suffered a dramatic setback after the medication change.

😍 6ft 1, blue eyes, works in finance. Tinder is embracing the meme. They’re testing a new setting where you can enter in your minimum and maximum height preferences when it comes to dating. (Alister: Be strong all my short kings.)

💻️ Computer intelligence. Cheating in schools using AI has become quite the issue. Some schools in America are even going analogue! All of the anti-cheating tactics can be flaky, flawed, or hard to enforce and monitor. What’s simpler? Pencil and paper.

🏆️ Let them vote. After becoming public that Oscar Awards voters don’t have to watch the movies, cinema owners are pushing to join the academy. The reason for letting them in? “We watch everything… It’s a no brainer.” Hard to argue with that.

By Alister

I am a huge fan of smart assistants. Be it on my wrist, phone, computer, or in any room of my flat, I love how I can easily use my voice to turn on fans, adjust TVs, and even play music throughout my home.

The one device I’ve underestimated is my smart display in the kitchen.

Perfect for looking up recipes, having some music while I cook, having a video call, and chatting whilst I make dinner. Even when making my morning coffee, a simple “Hey Google, good morning!” prompts a run-through of my schedule and tasks for the day, followed by today’s weather and news.

A fun and favourite task for the smart assistant is setting a timer. By giving the timer a specific name, the display will confirm with humorous visuals and sounds. So setting a 10 minute timer for chicken always gives me a bit of a cluck-le. 🐓

Trapped in a confined space, knees pushed against the seatback in front while it's also reclined into your lap. Could the situation get any worse? Yes, yes, it very much could.

Oh, for example, let’s say… a little girl could pick up the announcement phone and start to sing Moana to everyone on the plane. No escape.

@druziroaming

When your Delta flight is delayed 2 hours and you circle Orlando for another 2… But then a little girl sings Moana on the crew mic and sud... See more

As cringe as this is, there’s not a lot to love here. No one is singing along or encouraging her. No staff are about or in sight. They’ve given up too. It’s also not the best re-enactment of the song.

Personally, I’d be turning up my earbuds and drowning this out. Others online have been meaner. One individual said they would open the door mid-flight. Bit dramatic, but I get it. (Meridyth: It wasn’t that bad… and no, I wouldn’t let my son do it. But don’t be mean!)

Whew, you made it!

Now you’ve survived the half term break, it’s back to normal with less kids getting in the way when it’s time to pickup a meal deal. Join us again next week for more pointless squabbles.

Alister & Meridyth